If I could shuck my jack of all trades attitude and no longer be stifled from ever truly being great at something, I would be a vindictive asshole. I would be more than just good at it. My resentments would not stale. They would rot and congeal in the pit of my stomach like loaded ammunition with my vocal chords as the trigger.
I hate when people self diagnose, yet I can't help but attribute my disregard for other peoples' feelings as some kind of sadistic personality disorder instead of acknowledging the reality that I might just be an asshole. I don't think I am an asshole at the core of my being, but I wonder if maybe some people are just born not good or if bad people are made because I am starting to get the impression that I am just a really shitty person.
I need to watch The Bad Seed.
No. I need to stop procrastinating on homework.